"Romney was the overall winner among ascot-wearers.
Santorum won among the subset of voters wearing denim ascots.
Gingrich was the pick of those wearing gravy-stained ascots."
From "The Exit Polls Tell the Story", by Pete Reynolds. Published on McSweeney's Internet Tendency.
p.s. "Ron Paul was the choice of nearly 70% of those who have used a Bolo tie as an engagement ring."